Letting Go For Good

Letting go is one of the hardest and the most liberating thing a person can do.

You let go of the impossible goals you’ve set on for.

You let go of the feelings towards people who puts you in a bad situation.

And become fully self-actualized in a moment when you gained something from losing something really important.

Yesterday, I was at the church, and the priest talked about letting go. He explained that letting go will lead you to greatest happiness you never thought you’ll ever have, bring into a state of balance and stability and learned and understand at one point that everything happens for a reason, and what’s meant to be will happen as long as you trust and believe.

It was such good timing because I’m on a verge of letting go or I’ve been slowly letting go of the fantasy I think will become a reality years from now. That’s not to say, I’m not going to have the last effort to make this fantasy come true. Well, it won’t really come true, days had passed, and I realized that my interest on it is decreasing day by day. Maybe because I’m finally getting out for good from my bubble I constructed to protect myself and my future or maybe because I’m starting to see things I haven’t been seeing before. Making the last effort for it is to prove to myself that what I learned about it is not really meant to be.

Another thing that letting go creates in your life, it gives you something important to you too.

I gained something, not just one but a lot of more. And I am more than grateful because it never occurred to me that it would happen.

I gained the opportunity to do what I love, writing. I got another chance to pursue my other passion, singing, and my passion for the piano that I’ve lost maybe eleven or twelve years ago is back. Getting them back in my life made me the happiest person because I gave them up years ago.

God has been really good to me this year, not that he hasn’t been good in the previous years. I have to admit I’ve lost my way and became distrustful compared to how I was before in high school.

This year, what happened to me, made me somehow self-actualized. Letting go led me to my peak experience I’ve become much more happier, accepting, appreciative, grateful, considerate, positive, beautiful inside and out, confident about myself, active than I was before, more open-minded, it has given me more perspectives, made me think out of the box more often and see things differently.

You should try it too! It’s not easy, it’s hard, and very painful but it’s worth it. I assure you that.

Trust my word when I say that if it’s meant to be, it will happen and if it’s not something better will be given to you.


Singing: Big Part of Me

It never occurred to me how singing is not just an important part of my life, it is a very big part of me.

According to┬ámy mother, I’ve been singing since I was four years old. I usually sing and dance with my cousin as an amusement to our family members and that I’ve even sung during my school application when I was seven years old.

I wouldn’t say I have the voice of an angel or a diva but I can sing. I used to feel so envious of one of my classmate in high school because her voice is so high and beautiful. I wanted to be like desperately so when I was ten years old, I told my mother to enroll me on voice lessons. She didn’t, instead she enrolled me on piano lessons, which is the beginning of my hatred and bad memories of the piano. Don’t worry, I got over that and I’m not mad of the piano anymore. It just makes me sad every time I remember it.

In my final year in high school, finally I was able to join the choir. It’s one of the best and worst experiences of my life, because some of the choir members are bullies and makes fun of me.

Brings me to think of “Glee”, it is a place where you are free to be who you are and get a chance to be heard. I had my chance to shine when our choir moderator made me assist her sometimes in teaching some of our choir members are Alto voices because I can play the piano. It was nice but it wasn’t really how I wanted to shine. It pissed me off a little because again, I’m given a job as a pianist and not really as a singer. I want to sing, not play the piano! That was my mantra for a long time. Singing is one of the things that made me happy.

As I got into college, I was given another opportunity to join the choir. It’s one of the best things that happened to me because that’s where I met my close friends in College. It was short lived because our seniors got busy with school and some of them graduated. At least we spent and enjoyed a lot of time together.

Years later, I was given another chance to have some reintroducing with singing again. We we’re given basic singing lessons that improved my vocal control, and developed my vocal range. I’m so happy and proud that I can sing notes I can’t hit before. Another unexpected thing that happened to me is that my new choir members voted me the leader of the choir. I have yet to learn how to manage a choir but I am very much willing to manage and help them the best way I can.

I mentioned before that I have bronchitis for almost two weeks now, so I stopped singing for two weeks. Right now, I feel desperate to get well because yesterday I wasn’t able to served on the church. I really want to sing badly. I miss singing badly. I’m so grateful for the chance God had given me. I’m so happy he returned singing into my life.

And right now, it’s one of the things really cheering me up, making me confident about myself, making me happy, and giving me hope for the future.

I discovered days ago that you can become a music therapist, to help people with your singing. I wanna try that. Maybe when I get the chance, I will try to study that to be able to help people but right now, my focus is my choir members.